For All the Single Ladies in the Morning

Quiet applause for the single Mums who get themselves and their children ready for the day each morning. Quiet applause for the husbands-work-away mums who do the same. I am in neither of these categories, but in our household, the morning routine is solely my responsibility. And it is tiresome. Not even morning people (like me) enjoy being bombarded with questions and complaints upon waking. 

Since becoming a school mum, I've been slowing discovering ways to help the flow and make mornings nice. Oh, I'm not there yet, but with some grace, we do experience a smooth morning on occasion. Here are my tips:

Wake up early. Boo. Not one person wants to do this. And after seven years straight of 4:30am mornings, I feel like I deserve some more sleeping (now my kids sleep till 5:30 average). But I gave this a trial for one month and although I was tired during the day (I should adjust my bedtime when I am doing this), my mornings were remarkably better. I woke at 5am and used the spare half hour to do something that gave me focus, and made me happy. For me that was a child-free prayer/journalling time. 

 Leave the phone alone. Better to be facing the spilled milk or lost shoes or pre-test jitters in your own household without also being consumed with the same (or probably less concerning) problems of your best friend's sister-in-law's high school exchange student on Facebook (or the coolest things you are not doing with your life on Pinterest). Ain't nobody got time for that!

Pick one thing to prepare the night before. I like to pre-prepare the lunches, since these give me high heart rates when done in the morning. You could make sure the kids uniforms are ironed. Or choose your own outfit. It's a shame I can't do everyone's hair the night before as that would save plenty of stress!

Have a good chore system. Ours is finally working well. My children get pocket money for their weekday chores (this parallels the paid work they will do one day), but are still required to help around the house (without pay) when asked or when we need to do group cleaning up on the weekends (this parallels general helpfulness and responsibility in the home of their own one day).

Know your worst point and keep it calm. My everyday bad mood moment is walking out the door to the car and then getting every child/bag/homework folder/library bag/musical instrument in place and buckled. Unfortunately this is also the moment that can be heard by all my neighbours as our car is parked outside. I don't even know why I get worked up about it, as we have never been so late to school as the miss the bell, and even if we were, it is not an issue. Lateness (or possible lateness) is just that issue that I blow out of proportion and make into a crisis. Keeping things in perspective definitely helps the kids (and me) enjoy a peaceful lead-in to the day.

Have a happy soundtrack. After aforementioned bad mood moment, I usually want to put on some chill out music of my own choice to relax to in the car. But my kids have a great knack of choosing something fun to listen to and it invariably give us a happy ten minutes of singing and seat-dancing together. It turns the mood around and creates the best send-off to school that I can think of.

So single mums, solo in the morning mums, and even mums with help from dads, I'm wishing you joy in the mornings! 

Feasting and Festivities

Hear Ye, Hear Ye.

A lovely lady turned eight this week and celebrated with a medieval party.

The invitations were of Lady Elara, drawn by my sister.

The decor focused on the banquet table, spread with a collection of second hand silver goblets, cinnamon pastry crowns, and 'grown-up' tableware; and large tab top banners (made from $2/m fabric) that we hung overhead.

The costumes were reused from our most recent Abbey Medieval Festival visit.

The food was kid friendly dinner (and not particularly medieval).

For activities, Tim made a set of wooden stocks for everyone to try, and in line with the medieval tradition we threw food (marshmallows). An easy make catapult added to the marshmallow fun. A quick game of Knight, Mounts and Cavaliers used up some energy and gave everyone a laugh.

The castle cake was cookies and cream flavour ice cream, with plastic turrets (topped with chocolate covered cones and edible glitter), chocolate pebbles, wafers, felt flags and a fondant drawbridge. It was totally delicious!

The take-home bags were felt pouches, made with a button and drawstring, and filled with chocolate coins and miniature playing cards. We also had small castle charms for the girls that unfortunately didn't arrive in time.

It was a marvelous party and the Kelly Manor was honored to host the festivities!

Eight Girl

She wants more of the world, 

though each piece she has, she carries on her shoulders.

Days like this day, her birthday, 

I remember that she has always been the same. 

The baby that rarely napped.

The toddler who wouldn't be nannied by the tv.

The girl writing her alphabet by three.

And asking questions about death and life and love.

The forever 'bored' Primary schooler.

And the girl ahead of her years.

She is a thinker. 

A doer.

An asker.

Ofttimes a worrier.

But if I find her engrossed in a book, or listening to her favourite song on the ipod, or in her first few hours of night time sleep, she is at odds with that girl.

Her mind is at rest.

Her cheeks so perfect and pink.

Her eyelashes long and dreamlike.

Her golden streak of hair floating past her face.

She is divine, and dreamy.

And in those moments I am reminded that she is simply my sweet girl, now eight years on from being my sweet baby.

Taking Pride in the Present

Problems past,
and prospective plans.

Somehow I manage to let them press me from either side, and get squashed out of enjoying the present. So this resolution is simple.

Play. And be pleasant in the present.

Taking Pride in my Parenting Personality

I am not the fitness mum.
Or the frugal mum.
I am not the social mum.
Or the soccer mum,
or the take lovely photos of my kids mum,
or the keeping up with the trends mum.
I am not the green smoothie with chia mum and
I am far, far from being the pristine mum.

Though sometimes I try.
I don't think that it is a bad thing, to expand your horizon. To grow and learn and try out new things. But for me, practices often develop into expectations (created purely for myself, by myself). And herein lies the problem of guilt, and the subverting of my own parenting styles and ways.

As I moved from my got-to-be-like-everyone-else teen years, to my discover-who-you-are twenties, and now to my thirties, I sensed a grounding of my personality. I feel more comfortable knowing and being who I am (though still and always growing), instead of trying to be another/others/everyone else.

As far as parenting personality goes though, I am still child-like. I am still working to feel secure in my style. This is my second resolution for the year.
I am a creative mum.
I am a compassionate mum.
I am a Christ-led mum.

Taking Pride in my Possesions

I know, it sounds like a anti-resolution.

We should be shedding our stuff and simplifying and not getting caught up in the Jones' trap.

But we practice that resolution already. We have always aimed to be a generous family and I am a bit of a minimalist so we have regular culling and giving sessions (one day I will expand on how we practice charity at home). We definitely want to continue to give as lavishly as we can, this year.

But while generosity has helped us to release ownership of our 'stuff', it has also swayed us to release responsibility for our 'stuff'. We do not manage our possessions carefully. Our kids are often rough and messy and careless with toys and clothes and furniture. They are under the impression that things broken or ruined can (and will) be replaced (and often they are, because we can). As parents we haven't done a good job at training our children to respect and take pride in their possessions. And of course it is a pattern learnt from us. As adults in this house, we are lax at fixing things that are broken, and after we grow tired of them hanging around broken, we dump them and substitute a new. 

It is an unacceptable habit ecologically, financially and spiritually. So this year, I am aiming to take pride in what we have, and teach our children to do the same. And I am hoping that our well looked after possessions will create more opportunities for generosity.

"I'll try to take care of all the books piled up on my bed"

 "I'll keep my nice dresses and dancing costumes and fancy headbands off the floor"

"I won't break special things"

Singing a New Song 2014

I do my best
To find some kind of glow
I'm giving it some heart and soul, now
From the darkest greys
The sun bursts, clouds break...

Well, this is life in colour
Today feels like no other
From the darkest greys
The sun bursts, clouds break

Well, this is life in motion

And just when I could run this race no more

The sun bursts, clouds break
This is life in colour...

Lyrics are OneRepublic: Life in Colour. Here!

Our NY 2013 song here!

Our NY 2012 song here!